We seem to have developed a new sense of normal around here. Our days revolve around taking Georgia off the mask for a few hours at a time and then laying her down for a rest in between. How odd it is to be a mother administering morphine through an NJ tube without a second thought. (Truthfully, I shut down my thought process every time I do it) We play with her, read her stories and sing songs with her. Most of the time we don't see SMA even when I place that mask on her face. She smiles, laughs and vocalizes when she is happy and she whines and cries when she is upset. When I look at her, especially into those unforgettable eyes I see only perfection.
I feel like we are all standing on the edge of the cliff however, the sea water straight below and a storm brewing out in the distance. For the time being we are still living in the sunshine ignoring the dark clouds gathering afar. The winds could turn at any time and it would take but one giant wave to drag us all under.
Georgia was happy again today, especially this morning. Grumpa came for a visit and then this afternoon friends Roxanne and Michelle came. Thanks for painting our toenails Roxanne, the girls are just so thrilled about it. This evening Krista came with Abby so in the end it was a bit of a busy day but Georgia took it all in stride. Mike even managed to get her into a sleeper, the first clothes she's worn since first going into hospital -- over a month! She is once again sleeping peacefully up in her bed. Every night when I put her to bed I say a silent prayer that the night will be uneventful and she will wake up happy tomorrow morning.
Thank you to Rita and Laurie for your messages. I have spent a little bit of time on both of your blogs. I now know how everybody else feels when they try to find the words, pretty much speechless. I really like the poem about the pair of shoes Rita. Even though my child still lives and breathes I can relate. Your journal about Marshall is beautiful Laurie. I will spend more time getting to know you and your stories in the days and weeks ahead.
8 Years an Angel
2 weeks ago