Welcome to Georgia's Journey

Georgia Lily Lucas was born at home on October 6th, 2008 4:15am, in Winnipeg, Manitoba. She was diagnosed with SMA (Spinal Muscular Atrophy) on April 1, 2009.

On April 3rd Georgia was taken home, to be near her sisters and the rest of her family and friends. Nearly three weeks later, on April 21, 2009, she died peacefully -- in the loving arms of her mother and in the same room in which she was born.

Thursday, July 1, 2010


This week has been a roller coaster of emotions for me. Last weekend we of course celebrated Maya's fourth birthday. We had a small party for her on Saturday with a few of her little friends. It went really well and we were even able to get outside this year - first time since she turned one.

On Tuesday we celebrated Calla finishing up kindergarten. It was quite obvious that the teacher and the kids had all worked really hard into making a special presentation for all of us. There were songs, a couple of poems and a slide presentation followed by snacks of course. Calla has really come out of her shell this year and we couldn't be happier with her development. She is already looking forward to grade one.

The roller coaster of course comes into play when I stop and look around and feel the absence. All of these big days and celebrations I feel like something is missing. It's almost like a sense of panic when you think that you have forgotten something. Of course, I haven't forgotten anything. I am just always aware that Georgie is missing. She should have been running around getting into trouble at the party and we should have been trying to keep her quiet at Calla's celebration. Not to be. It really hits home when I look at pictures and see how much the girls have changed and grown. Georgie will remain 6 months forever.

Do you know that I never sent in a family picture to Calla's class this year as requested by her teacher? I had in fact forgotten at the beginning of the year but when I went in to volunteer I saw the wall where several photos of happy families were hanging and I remembered. Many of them were obviously taken during the summer holidays and all of them were full of joy. A family picture?? The last one we had taken was by the NILMDTS photographer and while I consider it absolutely beautiful I felt funny about sending it in. So...I didn't and funnily enough Calla never asked me to. Maybe she was just confused as me about a family picture.

How do I take a family picture really? If I wanted to take a picture of all four of my girls I could give one of them a picture of Georgie and have them hold it or I could line Calla, Maya and Aria up next to Georgie's headstone. I actually don't mind that idea but others would probably find it weird.

I don't even know how to sign the thank you cards I have been handing to people on behalf of gifts for Aria. Do I sign Georgie's name too? I wasn't but now I feel guilty. It is hard to reconcile with the idea that she will always be missing from every major event that we celebrate as a family. Fourteen months, one week and two days after losing Georgia and I miss her now as much as the day that she took her last breath.

Missing you running around at the beach today Georgie,

Love to you all,


Sunday, June 27, 2010

4 Years Old!

Dear Maya,

Four years ago your daddy's hands guided you into this world and we met you for the first time. I remember how when they later placed you in the bassinette next to my bed you rolled right onto your side so that you could still see me! I remember how you had a tuft of dark red hair at the top of your head and how later on it grew into a perfect mohawk! : ) By the time you were six months old you would sit at the dinner table with us and try to make us laugh. Even as a baby you were trying to make the people around you happy.

We love that at 4 you love to dance. When you are happy, you will sing and dance around our house making us all want to join in with you.
We love that at 4 your excitement about life is contagious. I watched you skip all the way to a friend's house the other day and couldn't stop smiling.
We love that you are kind and sweet.
We love that you are determined and stubborn.
We love that you are the little sister and the big sister.
We love that your outfits of choice are usually bathing suits - even when its -30 outside!
We love that you think that Grand Forks is the greatest place on earth!
We love that you are smart and independent even when it's frustrating for us parents.
We love your innocence and your wisdom.
We love watching you change and grow.

Maya, you are the spark in this family. The one that keeps us all on our toes, making us laugh along the way. We love you to the moon and back!

Happy 4th Birthday to the Littlest Big Girl!

Love Mommy and Daddy