When I was 13 I could spend hours in my room listening to music. Anybody remember being 13? It is a truly defining time in your life. You are trying to figure out who you are. It also kind of sucks to be 13. You're not really a kid anymore and you're not an adult either. You want the independence of someone older and the comfort of someone younger. Like I said, when I was 13 I spent hours listening to music. Now that I am as old as I am : ) I find myself doing the same thing. Georgie brought the music back into my life.
After Calla and Maya were born the car became home to Fred Penner and Backyardigans music. While I certainly don't mind the music, after you've heard the same song for the hundredth time in a few days you start to tune it out. I am not kidding. Calla was so in love with Fred Penner that he was the only cd in the car for over a year. When Georgia was born and seemed to love music so much we started branching out a little bit. I discovered that all 3 of my children love U2 and many other pop songs. When Georgie was admitted into the hospital we played mostly lullabies to keep her calm but once we got home we played all kinds of stuff. I actually know the song that was playing as she took her last breath. It was Buffalo Soldier on the Bob Marley lullubies cd.
Where am I going with all of this music talk? Besides the fact, that I am happy to have rediscovered music I have come to realize something. I am very much like a 13 year old again trying to figure out who I am. Do you remember how at 13 you could be having the time of your life and then somebody could say something or you would think of something and all of your confidence was shaken? Do you remember how you could feel so passionately about things that you were easily brought to tears? Okay that one is for the ladies! Do you remember how you felt like you could do anything or become anyone but you weren't sure what? That's my life now. I am 13 again. Unsure, shaky confidence and yet I have a belief that I am on my way.
Thank you to Maureen and the gang in Oakbank for their fundraising pool tournament for Children's and SMA research. If anyone is still considering donating to Chidren's on behalf of Georgia we ask that you kindly consider having your donation directed towards Pediatric Palliative Care. Our heroes will take it from there.
Love to you all,
8 Years an Angel
2 weeks ago