Welcome to Georgia's Journey

Georgia Lily Lucas was born at home on October 6th, 2008 4:15am, in Winnipeg, Manitoba. She was diagnosed with SMA (Spinal Muscular Atrophy) on April 1, 2009.

On April 3rd Georgia was taken home, to be near her sisters and the rest of her family and friends. Nearly three weeks later, on April 21, 2009, she died peacefully -- in the loving arms of her mother and in the same room in which she was born.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Let the Light Shine

Since losing Georgia I have stopped dismissing every coincidence in my life as just that. Sure, I still believe in coincidences but I am often surprised by how the right person, the right book, the right situation etc. will just present itself when I need it most. The other day we received our monthly flyer from the local pizzeria and I was surprised to see that she had included the following passage:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

I have had many moments since April 21st where I would love to have hidden under the blankets and shrunk down until people stopped noticing me, but who am I to do that? There are still moments where I would love to just make myself invisible and sneak away unnoticed but I know that is not what I am meant to do. It is not who I am meant to be. I have been given a gift, many gifts actually but the one that I am referring to right now is the one that will have the greatest impact on the rest of my life.

Georgia's life and death has set my life's journey down a new path. A path that is filled with possibilities despite the many twists and turns along the way. It is up to me as her mother to help let her light shine. One of the ways that I do this is by reaching out to others to help me find ways of honouring her. October 3rd will be just one event in a continuous string of ideas and events that we will continue to remind people of the light that she brought with her. In doing so I have been liberated from fears and am learning to shine on my own.

I have no choice but to adopt this tactict you see because I will never just 'fit in' again. I am now the woman that lost the child. I am the woman that people recognize as 'the one that lost that baby'. I know that I am many other things to many people but I also understand how many people see me first. I will never just 'fit in' again. And so the question when one is left to stand alone is, "Do I shy away and try to make myself invisible or... do I rise up...face my fears head on...and let the light shine?"

Love to you all,

Kristen



4 comments:

  1. Kristen, you have been a powerful source of light for me, so my answer to your question is to yes, please keep the light shining. That may sound selfish, but you know what I mean.

    Love Kim

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  2. Very profound post...you have me thinking.

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  3. Kristen,

    Once again, your words are beautiful, profound, eloquent, and inspiring... although I know that that is not the purpose of your posts.

    I believe that you do not set out to write inspirational messages for all of us to say, WOW - great post. Nor do you pour over the computer for hours on end, trying to come up with that one, pivotal, life changing sentence that takes your readers' collective breaths away...

    I imagine that this is coming "naturally" to you, part of the "process", - part of "your journey", - so to speak.


    In speaking with others who know you well, and in my heart of hearts, I am convinced unequivocally you were "chosen" to be put on this unimaginable, unthinkable, sometimes "god awful", twisting path when a majority of us wouldn't even be considered. You see, it may not be obvious to you, but since April 21, 2009, or better yet, since Georgia's diagnosis, it has become blatantly obvious to us. You were chosen not only because you would "shine", but become the brightest light out there.

    Hugs & thinking of you,
    Shar

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