Today I went to the gym to run. I was just over a mile when I hit a mental block. You know, everybody has them sometimes. For whatever reason I just wanted to stop running. For me it is pushing past the close to panic feeling I get when I am even a little bit out of breath. That's what years of asthma does to you. I am often afraid to keep going just in case I'm not able to catch my breath again. It is totally mental however as my asthma is almost non-existent nowadays (unless I have a cold) and my lungs are in pretty decent shape. As I continued running and trying to convince myself mentally to keep running I started listening to the words of a song that was playing.
Somebody recently told me that Georgia often sends me music and songs. I don't disbelieve this idea because there have been many moments over the last couple of months where certain songs would just start to play when I'm around. I'm talking about the radio, the mall, the doctor's office etc. There was even one night where I was drawn up from the office by a melody. I walked into the living room and asked Mike what he was listening to and he replied nothing. There was absolutely no music playing and yet I could have sworn there was.
So, at the gym this morning I started listening to the words to this song. Being out of the loop with a lot of pop culture I had never heard this song before. I came home later to find out that it is the new American Idol song and is probably on the charts. I don't claim to be cool people! Here are some of the lyrics:
With every step, you climb another mountain
Every breath, it's harder to believe
You'll make it through the pain, weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing
Just when you think the road is going nowhere
Just when you almost gave up on your dreams
They take you by the hand and show you that you can
You can go higher, you can go deeper
There are no boundaries above and beneath you
Break every rule 'cause there's nothing between you
And your dreams
Now obviously this song was written for the American Idol winner following his dreams to stardom and yet I found it amazingly appropriate in that moment on the treadmill. In the end, I ran another mile before walking a little again. Whether or not Georgie sent me that song, I have carried this moment with me all day. It has even given me a few laughs. This is often how I get through many of my days. I think of a moment and I cling to it. Healthy? Not sure, but I'm still here finding reasons to smile, laugh and love everyday so I don't really care. Thank you Georgie for teaching how me to do this even on the darkest of days!
Love to you all,
8 Years an Angel
2 weeks ago