I have avoided writing the last few days as my ability to focus has gone downhill along with my mood. One of the reasons for this is that Mike's request for stress leave was denied despite the doctor saying that he definitely needs some more time. A registered letter arrived Wednesday morning telling him that he is to report back to work next week or no longer be paid. I guess that burying your daughter isn't stressful enough for his company to give someone time. Needless to say I was so angry that I could have spit! Mike became a stressed out mess not sure of even how to proceed. With the help and guidance of some friends he has decided to appeal. We'll see what happens!
On a more positive note the lovely staff at Lacoste's Garden Centre have set us up with someone to come and help design the backyard, the most important part being Georgie's garden. I know that some of you wonder how I spend my time. Sometimes I find myself driving down St Mary's heading out to the garden centres. I actually find peace there. There is nobody to bug you and you are surrounded by thousands of beautiful flowers. On Sunday, Maya and I were there walking the aisles. I had just finished telling her that we weren't going to buy anything when we both started admiring these tiny pink flowers. I actually had no idea what they were until I read the tag. Forget-Me-Nots. So, Maya and I marched back out to get a cart and threw a few in.
I know that many of you have been expecting to see me and yet I still find it hard to go out. I am still seeking solitude. I have some almost good days and some really bad days at this point. I only answer the phone when I feel like talking and I rarely call people back. Forgive me but this is where I'm at. So far, I have managed to take the girls to gymnastics on Monday, that was an almost good day. I have left the other activities to others or left them alone completely. If you have emailed me and I haven't emailed back it's because I often find it hard to concentrate, not because I don't appreciate your messages.
Thank you Candace for the Ellen t-shirt. The message on the front seems amazingly appropriate and I will wear it with pride. Thank you Kimmy for your amazing fundraising and the tree planting ideas. It will be a great day! Thank you again Victoria. Stay strong!
Love to you all,
8 Years an Angel
1 month ago