Because I Can

After Georgia died my life seemed to be a nightmare and like any normal human being I felt the urge to run away. Running away of course, really wasn't an option. While I wanted to run from the pain, anger and hurt, I didn't want to run away from my family. So, I did the next best thing. I jumped onto a treadmill and somewhere along the way I started to feel better.

I have never been to see a therapist, nor have I ever taken antidepressents. I am one of the lucky few that found a different drug of choice - running. Running has never been easy for me. Those of you that have followed my story the last couple of years know how true this is. I have only ever really run a couple miles at a time. Often it's just enough time to clear my head and fill me with positive energy for the next couple of days. Being pregnant for a fourth time, breast feeding and getting up several times a night left me with little more energy.

In my cyber world, I have met people who have done all kinds of amazing things. Bill Strong is about to run his first marathon, just having completed his first half marathon. This on top of working full time and caring for a three year old with SMA. Then there's Stephen Taylor. He just ran 100 miles AGAIN! There's also Magda. Magda came up with the slogan - "We run for those who can't" The slogan that Stephen Taylor, Magda and one hundred others wore back in March as they ran the New Bedford half marathon. They are already planning to do it again next year.

Magda has also launched a challenge to to make this the best July ever by coming up with three big goals - a fitness, a nutrition and a spiritual goal. There is a group of us online that have all signed up and people regularly post about what they're up to. Now my fitness goal had nothing to do with running (it was core strength) but last week as I read an article I came up with another one. The article was posted by somebody else in the group and the message that stuck with me was that most of us will spend more energy thinking about the things that we'd like to be able to do instead of actually making them happen. Hmmmm...

So, I signed up to run a 10k in August. I know, I know it's not a marathon or even a half marathon but it's going to leave me empowered!! I have asked and received permission to wear the slogan, "We run for those who can't" and am going to have a few t'shirts made up with GJH's logo. I am hoping that a few others will want to join me or want a t shirt even if they are just running for fun. But, I have learned something else this month.

For the first time in over two years I am O.K. I am no longer afraid to stand on my own two feet. Even if I am the only person who ever wears one of those shirts and gets out there to run I will be just fine. I will always be in good company as I know that my reasons for running are good. I run not just in memory of Georgia but in memory of so many others. I also run for those little people still fighting.

Two years ago I wanted to run away from a nightmare but I now realize that you can never run away from a nightmare. The only way to ever feel better is to wake up. I am finally doing just that. I have set a goal and I will run simply because I can.

If you'd like to join me please let me know. You won't believe how good it feels to run for others. : )

Love to you all,

Kristen